WASHINGTON,DC (People's Bureau of Truth) - Spokesmen for US President George Bush announced today that he has formally accepted the position of Sherriff of Planet Earth.

"Cards have been played" explained Bush, "Some cards are good cards, and some cards are, you know, not as good" he continued. Explaining that the President of the United States has a God Given Right to call anybody out, Bush announced that certain parties had "48 hours to get off the planet" or else "We'll start bombing other people that just live there at High Noon".

"American businesses have a right to the oil in any country", Bush explained, "and you can be sure all the bombs we'll be dropping are made by God Fearing American Capitalists" he added.

While the Glorious People's War is expected to cost the taxpayers several hundred billion dollars, at least somebody will be making a profit!

"The Exxon your face" shouted Bush, as he stared meanly at the picture of Saddam on his practice range. "Our Mobil forces are ready" the Sherriff quipped. "We are tired of this Shell game" said the Sherriff as he drew both of his revolvers at once.